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What I’d Really Like To Say

Posted by Keith Elder | Posted in Funny Stuff | Posted on 02-02-2010

I’ve been getting about oh, 3-7 emails a day telling me I should use someone’s service to optimize my website so I can be on the first page of Google.  I mean seriously, how do you think they found me in the first place!?  After getting fed up deleting emails I decided to respond.  Here is my email to said random person.  I think I was a little too polite, but I think the anger comes across nicely even in text.


Comments (3)


Just in case you haven’t sent it yet.

fulfill is one word

“a 100 yards” & “a 100 years” should be “a hundred yards” & “a hundred years” respectively.

Dear %{Mr|Ms|Dr}% %LastName%,

I see you are in the market for SEO Services.

We would like to get your website on first page of Google for %Keyword%.

All of our processes use the most ethical “white hat” Search Engine Optimization techniques that will not get your website banned or penalized.

Please send $100 to dan AT danhounshell.com for down payment to secure our services.

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